Conflict with an Open Heart

Why do we fight?

Conflict frequently occurs when there are unspoken needs hidden behind confrontational attitudes or aggressive behavior.

To resolve conflict, no matter how exasperating the disagreement may be, we should approach our opponent with an open heart, filled with compassion. Abandon judgments and blame in exchange for mutual respect.

This is in line with my tagline, dignified divorce driven by compassionate expertise. Even in the most contentious divorce, if you accept that you have no power to change your adversary, and you see an opportunity to compromise, you can proceed with dignity, respecting yourself, not holding on to resentment.

It’s important to make a conscious effort to release anger and resentment. Your feelings are your creation. Yes, the details of the situation may exist as you see them, and they may indeed be frustrating.

But you can’t change another person. Ever.

The only thing you can change is how you view the situation, and how you react to it.

It is always possible to transform battles into opportunities for compromise. Each member of a relationship must be open to communication, to listening and to finding a middle ground, because it always exists.

But the process begins with you. You know the saying, be the change you wish to see in the world? It’s spot-on. Change starts with you.

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